Pace, pace, pace, lead

Over decades of professional development, few concepts have stuck in my mind as firmly as this one, which I first came across many years ago in a session on something like ‘Overcoming resistance’ or ‘Having difficult conversations’, delivered by a kind, perky and effective trainer.

I love both its humanity and its useful simplicity.

I love that it focuses first on the 'who' and ‘how’ and not the ‘what’ or ‘where’ of helping someone to shift their energy, their understanding and perhaps themselves.

It has informed my management, mentoring and coaching, and also how I want to be handled myself.

Because I will always say …

Don’t stand over there in that ‘better’ place, shouting at me to join you.

Don’t give me your three simple steps to getting there.

Don’t tell me what you would do and what I should stop and start doing.

And don’t dismiss what I’m feeling or experiencing, knowing or believing, or substitute it with what you feel, experience, know or believe.

Instead, come and stand over here with me, walk alongside me, listen and learn about me and my world.

And then can you lead me to a place that we've determined is a better one for me.

And that, dear readers, is what good coaching looks like.

*****

Find it through professional and accrediting bodies, such as (in the UK) the Career Development Institute’s list of Registered Career Development Professionals. And right here, obviously.



Photo: Annie Spratt on Unsplash