On looking the part

In 2001, my sister and I went to Buckingham Palace to see our father receive an MBE for services to the arts. At the time, Catherine was running her own kitchen design business in a small country town and I was halfway through my doctoral study in socio-architectural history.

As we walked into the building, we were approached by two serious men in dark suits, who asked if we were with Special Branch.

We laughed at the very idea of it. But we obviously fitted some bill.

Was it the height? Catherine was 5’ 11” while I’m a healthy 5’8” plus heels.

Was it the outfits? We were both in skirt suits: mine tailored and black over a jazzy top and hers a stylish cream linen.

Was it something about our demeanour? Which was probably a mixture of nervous aloofness and scanning the room for signs to the toilets.

We often wondered what would have happened if we’d answered ‘yes’. We also wondered if we’d missed a trick, career-wise 🤔

There are VERY MANY negative aspects to being judged about your match for a particular profession based on your appearance, which can include both malleable and unmalleable factors, such as ethnicity, gender, age, height, weight, and style. There is a LOT of work needed to overcome these habitual pre-assessments.

But it’s nice when a potentially negative characteristic works in your favour …

For example, when I was starting out in my coaching career, a friend pushed me to overcome my photograph phobia and upload a picture to my LinkedIn profile. As she pointed out: ‘Your age is an asset for what you’re doing. People need to see how old you are. It makes you more credible.’

Well, I hope that’s the case. Sometimes we have to work with what we’ve got 😂